48 Days

I realize I haven't blogged in over 4 months so if anyone is looking to me for a daily, weekly or monthly blog you're probably out of luck. I will try to blog more but I normally forget what I intended to blog about when I have time or remember I had something I wanted to blog about. My kids load me up with blogging material but they also keep me busy which is why I often forget my stories.

I am reading this book called 48 days to the work you love by Dan Miller. I recommend the book to anyone who is struggling like I am to find a job that they enjoy and pays you appropriately. After reading the first chapter there were some questions for you to answer. I thought I would put them on the laptop so I wouldn't have to keep up with a notebook. The very last question is: "If nothing changed in your life in the next 5 years, would that be OK?" I'm not real good with the quoting and citing sources so if I'm doing something illegal let me know...I might change it.

I was talking to one of my frat brothers who just graduated from law the other night and I brought up this very statement to him. In the past 5 years of my life not much has changed at all. I have 2 more mouths to feed and a third on the way and more debt than I did 5 years. I'm not exactly living the American dream! This thought blew me away. I am worse off financially, by a long shot, than I was 5 years when I was working part-time at Sprint Tax and going to school. How pathetic is that? This isn't a poor Nate or cry for pity but a realization I hadn't noticed or thought about it recently. I realize that I have made some poor decisions that are the direct result of my current situation and I can't change that. If I could turn back time I never would have quit Wal-Mart, but hindsight and second-guessing is easy to do. Right now I'm smiling thinking about the trials and things I have gone through personally and with my family. I have seen God work in mighty ways through friends and family. God has poured his grace upon me during this time by opening hearts and check books to pay my bills. I have two friends who gave a total of $1,800.00 to us. Unreal! One friend gave anonomously after reading one of my first blogs. I didn't put that blog up there in order for people to give us money. It's my job to provide for my family, not my friends/family. I'm not saying it's bad for others to help out those in need, that's what being a Christian is all about. I'm praying that God will help me find a meaningful job that allows me to provide for my family also. I think I want to do something that involves an aspect of ministry or do full-time ministry work. I really don't know which is why I'm in my current position. I have a lack of focus and direction in my life in what I think God is calling me to do professionally. I am trying to change that with God's help and leading.